Corporate Breakup Rule #1: Deal….don’t dwell.

the corner of panic and calm

Getting laid off is a big change. Often, a painful and unwanted change. When we are faced with a major change, the natural tendency is to dwell on the past, worry about the future, doubt ourselves and get stuck.

All these emotions are natural reactions, so don’t beat yourself up over them. But when you dwell too much on the negative, it becomes problem generating.

When we dwell, we go over the same ground again and again: “Why did this happen to me?,” ” What did I do wrong?,”  “Will I ever be able to find another job?”

Have you ever done this? Gone over the same ground again and again, and come out at the same place?

When you deal instead of dwell, you focus in the present moment and take control over how you think and act. You become a problem solver. You think empowering thoughts, ask better questions and take action. It can sound like this: —“OK—I might not be comfortable with job hunting, but I’m not going to let that stop me. First I’m going to educate myself about the companies I like. Then I’m going to decide: How can I move forward?” and “Who can help me?”

You need to be able to acknowledge your fears and doubts, then turn them into planning and action.  Remember—you choose your thoughts and actions. You choose what’s next.

When faced with change, always ask yourself: “What’s the next positive step I can take to move myself forward?” Then, do it.

How about you–do you deal or dwell?

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